The Funniest Pick Up Lines of All-Time
September 6, 2008 by Tom
I’m sure women get these more than guys, but I’ve heard (and used) some of the stupidest pick up lines before. Don’t get me wrong, some are so stupid that it has to make you laugh. And who knows, it may just get you a phone number or two.
1. Are your parents retards… cause you special!
2. Hey Baby, did you fart… cause you blow me away!
3. You must’ve just had Campbell’s soup… cause you’re lookin’ mmm… mmm… good!
4. Excuse me, I’d like to have kids someday… I just wanted to know your parents created such a beautiful angel?
5. Your parents must be terrorists… cause you da BOMB!
6. Hey, do you like McDonalds… well, just call me “Big Mac.”
7. Hello, my name is Elmo and baby you can tickle me anytime you want!
8. I would buy you a drink but I’d just be jealous of the glass.
9. Do you like chocolate… well, just call me Mr. Goodbar!
10. I’m not going to ask for your phone number cause I know you’d say ‘no’ so can I have your e-mail address?
11. I’m not Fred Flinestone but I can definitely make your bed rock!
12. I’ve heard sex is a killer… want to die happy?
13. Can I read your t-shirt in brail?
14. What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible Hulk? My zipper.
15. You might as well sleep with me because I’m going to tell everyone we did anyways!
16. Let’s make like a fabric softner and snuggle!
17. Excuse me, I wrote this poem for you… Roses are red, violets are blue. I’m not a poet, but damn girl, you’re HOT!
18. Hi, I work at Subways but I only can give you a footlong.
19. Are you a computer whiz… it seems you know how to turn my software to hardware.
20. Ouch! Damn… do you have a band-aid? I cut my knee when I fell for you.
21. *looks and pats around her back* Hey, I thought angels had wings?
22. I’ve heard milk does a body good but DAMN how much did you drink?!
23. Are you parents bakers… cause you got some hot buns!
24. I wanna get all hot and sweaty and listen to you breathe hard… um, you wanna go running?
25. Can I have a picture… I want to show Santa what I want for Christmas.
And one of my favorites…
(Next time you see someone sneeze) “I would say God Bless you but it looks like he already did!”
[...] instance, my very first post on there was “The Funniest Pick Up Lines of All-Time” which was fun writing and looking up. And yes, I used a couple of those lines before because I’m [...]
Guy: Excuse me did u touch my ass?
Girl: Umm nooo!
Guy:Damn!…
If your were a new burger at McDonalds you would be a McSexy:)
When God made you he was showing off:)
Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got FINE written all over you.
We’re like Little Ceasar’s, we’re Hot and Ready.
there are some of the ones i use:)
lol
Lets do a math sum, lets add me and you subtract our clothes divide ur legs and multiply!!!
The voices in my head told me to come over and talk to you xD
Your hott, lets bang.
You’ll do.
DAMN!
Are you from Narnia? coz you sure make my lion roar.
Lets be honest we both know ur gonna leave here with me any way
do u have a dollar? my mum told me to call her when i fell in love.
Are you the moon? coz u make my werewolf grow.
” this music’s kinda loud… Can i use ur thighs as ear-muffs?”
“i’m frito lay if you’re everready.”
;]
is your last name gillette? cause your the best a man can get .
OH DANG! LETS BANG! hahahahahahah
r u from tennasee? cuz ur the only ten i see!!!
tee hee
are you parents retarded cause your very speical to me
Guy’s always use these lines on me! It’s just so funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
1.It’s a good thing i brought my Library card cuz i’m checking you out!!!!!!!!!!!:)
2.If i told u, u had a nice body, would you hold it against me?
3.Are you a parking ticket cuz you got ‘FINE’ written all over you!
:) 
:) 
:) 
LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL
Hope you get a hang out of these! it’s so funny when guy’s use on me. I get a kick out of these.
i thnk pic up linez r amazin me an my frenz luk emm up all da tyme so we can use em on peple
an we luv them they r so funny!!!!
an wen guyz use dem on me i thnk itz soooo kute!!! lol
these r my fav pick up lines
how come i know hudreds of thousands digits of pie and i dont know the 10 digits of ur phone # !
1) you’ve been a bad girl. go to my room.
2) you look like an ice cold glass of water and im thirsty!
3) i would buy you a drink but i would be jelous of the glass
4) did you ever work at a fruit stand? no. cause you still have the melons!
5) pull my finger!
6)let’s play titanic. i say iceberg! you go down.
7) come over here and sit on my and we will talk about the first thing that pops up!
9) did you ever kiss a bunny between the ears? (turn pockets inside out) did you wanna!
10)i can spell boobies on my calculator, but i’d much rather see yours!
there u guys go! my favorites! have fun and use them. THEY WORK! i’m16 and they work for me
If we were both squirrels, i would store my nuts in your hole.
Im Gay